When I first went to Israel I climbed mountains in the Negev desert for three weeks. I was 16. If I had known that mountain climbing was to be part of my Israel experience, I would never have gone. Seriously. On one climb in particular, I was having great difficulty. I was hot, annoyed and thirsty. I was tired, self conscious and concerned that I would not be able to complete the ascent.
I was thrilled when we finally reached the summit for I knew that I wouldn't have any trouble climbing down the mountain. That was always the easy part. The worst was over, or so I thought...until Yossi, our guide showed me the rope that I had to use to repel down. "Just hold on to the rope and repel" he demanded. I approached the mountain cliff and looked down at my friends who all seemed to have no problem following directions. They looked like ants. I will spare you the details of my fierce determination to NOT leave the mountain. Eventually of course I took the rope from the Yossi.
I remember the moment the rope was fully in my hands and I was on my own. I lowered myself down to meet friends who were cheering me on and it was the first time in days that I allowed myself to see how beautiful my surroundings were. It was the first time that day that I felt present to what was happening to me. I felt strong and good. And it was the first time I remember feeling held by a Power greater then myself. My first step down that mountain was a leap of faith.
Our courageous actions stay with us through out our lifetime. In a sense they alter our DNA. We take the trials we have overcome with us where ever we go and they help sustain us and guide us. Doing teshuva affords us an opportunity to reflect on moments when we felt strong and acted with courage.
At some point in our lives, we have all taken a 'leap of faith'. May Elul 17 remind us of these times and may they continue to carry us from strength to strength.
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